I DON'T WANT A VIDEO CAMERA DOWN THERE!

My bargain Book Shopping Spree

Today Curt's sister Angela called to tell us about this Father's Day thing for Curt's Dad tomorrow afternoon. At the end of the conversation she asks who is going to be in the room when I give birth (wow that sounds strange!) I told her probably just Curt would be in there with me, that I didn't think I wanted anyone else in there. So of course she says "Well I want to be in there, I've never seen a baby be delivered before, I'll even film it" Which I then explained that we weren't going to a hospital in town, we are going to the Birth Center, which is REALLY far away from her house since she lives off of Presidents Street downtown and the Birth Center is in Rincon. She told me to print off a map then and bring it when we all get together tomorrow (well now it is today).

The reason I don't think I want anyone there is 1) we are not going to be there that long. The birth center is not like a "normal hospital" you can stay up to 24 hours but once they determine that mom and baby are fine and you want to leave you can go (you have to stay for 4 hours after birth though). It is totally how comfortable you are and when you are ready. I know this freaks a lot of people out but pregnancy isn't a disease. Women have been giving birth for millions of years. Besides what could be better to recuperate then your own bed instead of a strange hospital room?

2) There are a lot of alternative methods at the birth center (they do have drugs) that I can do to relieve pain like the shower or the big bathtub (you can even deliver in there if you want) and so there is some nakedness that could be involved and I just got up the courage to post a picture of my belly on here, I don't think I am ready to let it all hang out in front of anyone other then Curt and my midwife... and I KNOW I don't want a video camera capturing it all!

3) Also me in labor is anything like me during pregnancy there is just some times when I don't want anyone to be around or anyone to bother me. (Thank you Caller ID)

I know Angela is just being nice and she wants to be supportive, she also told me if I ever need anything to call her if I get stressed off I could just drop my baby over there. I think though I'm going to end up pissing people off once the baby is here because I am going to be a totally different parent then a lot of people I know. I think I am going to be one of those anal mothers who doesn't just want anyone picking up my kid and I'm going to make sure he is always clean. Also I am planning on doing the whole dreaded BREASTFEEDING thing. LOL! Oh and the fact that we are going to the birth center some people don't understand because it isn't as convenient for them as the hospital would be.

I guess I am worried about how OTHER people will feel with the whole labor thing and when the baby comes. Why I am coming up with rationalizations I don't know, I should just be able to tell everyone what I want. I'm the one giving birth! Why am I concerned about other people's feelings? Curt is 100% behind me as well, he doesn't want anyone there either. (He said I can have whoever I want there, but he is fine with it just being us).

Well after that I decided to head to the mall to walk around in the AC and to get Father's day cards and pick up a few things for Curt for his first Father's Day (which I will go into after Sunday just in case he reads this). I ended up going to Barnes and Noble on the way out because that is where the closest bathroom was according to the customer service lady. I ended up picking up a few bargain books because I realized I read tons of pregnancy books but they all end with labor! I know books don't have all the answers but I am really worried about how to get my kid to sleep in his own room after he sleeps with us the first week or so.

When did life get so complicated?

My best friend Katie is in town for the weekend and we are supposed to get together tomorrow night. I am even stressed out about that! My brain has been taken over by everything baby, I don't want to bore her to death! I know I am going to be self conscience about everything I say over analyzing if I have talked too much about being pregnant... and even if I don't say "baby" one time my big belly will be sticking out to remind us both.