It is October!

Early Saturday Morning

Lucas and I stayed home today while Curt went to his Grandfather's. (Normally we would go hang out with my family) but Lucas woke up today with a little bit of a cold and I want him to get better before next weekend. I know Curt just thinks I am crazy or something but every time Lucas is around people that smoke the next day he has trouble breathing. It is a delicate situation because it is usually his family we are around. I love them all and want Lucas to have a good relationship with them and want them to cuddle with him and kiss on him but at the same time I am worried about his health and I'm not sure what to do. They aren't smoking around him but his pediatrician told me the smoke stays in their clothes, and then when they are holding him Lucas breathes it in.

It is sort of hard to talk to Curt about is because he smokes too (but never always takes a shower and puts on clean clothes before handling Lucas) and I think sometimes he feels like I am attacking his family or that I'm trying to think up an excuse to not go around them. Also sometimes I think he feels like it is just my excuse to blame everything on or like I think my family is better than his. None of which are true!

I think it is also hard for everyone to understand because I use to smoke too for a little while (I started after I started dating Curtis because as lame as this is "everyone else was doing it and I felt left out.") Honestly what keeps me from smoking now is Lucas. Last night when we were at dinner with his family EVERYONE went outside to smoke, even the nonsmokers that were there and the only people inside were Lucas and I. I miss out on the conversations now because everyone goes outside to smoke and stays outside talking. Also it sort of ticks me off when Curt smokes around his family only because that means I'm going to be the one taking care of Lucas and I won't get a break. He isn't doing it to be mean I know, he doesn't want to be left out either I guess.

I'm just not sure how to handle the whole smoking issue. I'm just glad we are going out of town soon! It will be nice to get away for a little bit. Next weekend we are going to Helen, GA for a family reunion. We all rent out the Tanglewood Lodge and some people stay in cabins. It has been a tradition to go there in October for years but this might be the last year everyone goes. I'm really excited to go so everyone can meet Lucas. We weren't able to see everyone in July when they went to St.Simons because I was pregnant and due the following week so I couldn't travel.